March 24 Back Home

Back Home

Last week this time I was wheeled into the operation room. Praise God I am now at home. Yesterday was my first day back home from hospital. I still cannot walk around well due to the wound and I also have to manage the draining of fluid (pray that I do it well). But it is so GOOD to be home! With help I washed my hair and felt great.

Then I turned on the computer and read all the emails. Thank you all for your prayers and kind words of encouragement. Unfortunately I cannot answer them all. The problem is I usually get stuck in the same position in front of a computer. Yesterday I might have even strained my arm (real bad after lymph node removal). I must change these bad habits. I probably would prefer not to have visitors until later too. I enjoy people so much I tend to get excited when people are around; it is not a bad habit but it does take up energy. For now my priority is to rest and to rest in the Lord. I will try to treasure this as a special and required retreat to Him.

After relaxing for a while, I began to walk around and checked on things. It is real hard to be at home and not fix this and that. In the evening as I pondered on the next step of treatment, I started to feel anxious about the journey ahead. I became angry at Victor for misplacing receipts and “messing things up” (such as the kitchen stove top and the razor in the bathroom sink). The truth is I am afraid of not being able to care for him as he cannot take care of himself; the worst is I have to become more dependent on him taking care of me.

Although I got a bit emotional, the Lord blessed me with good sleep and reminded me to rest in His arms. (Psalm 127:2 ) “…For he grants sleep to those he loves.” (NIV) [Or “For He gives to His beloved even in his sleep.” (NASB)] Both translations are just as good!

Please pray for a home help in our area. A sister in the Lord is coming over to help me this week. But I certainly felt bad as she lives far away. Man Wan is a bit isolated. We want to find one soon to reduce work for Victor and to get the routine ready before my chemotherapy. I pray for a helper that can teach me to better manage cooking and to eat healthy as well.

The Lord has special blessings during my stay in the hospital and I will share them with you later in the blog. Loving parents set a time limit on computer use for their kids. I must do that to myself too!